Chapter Twenty-Six -- Gringotts
Feb. 3rd, 2008 12:54 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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minkhollow.
***
In which Gringotts appears to have taken advantage of security testing, the Trio did not plan fora bank full of nuns what would happen if they were suspected/caught, and a few of the plot points were cooler the first time people used them.
Chapter Twenty-Six -- Gringotts
So. Starting in the previous chapter, the Trio's been getting insider information on Gringotts from Griphook, for great stealing a probable Horcrux from the Lestranges' vault. A big part of their plan involves Polyjuicing Hermione into Bellatrix.
This? Is actually a remarkably good start, all things considered. Even though they know some of the pitfalls of Polyjuice impersonation coming off the Ministry sneak, this time they know a fair amount about who they're impersonating - and hey, they even have her wand!
Speaking of which, Hermione gets the receiving end of wrong wand existential angst, despite dismissing Harry's as lack of practice earlier. Harry, showing an amazing amount of common sense, opts not to call her on it. Here's a funny thing, though - having Draco's wand seems to have cured Harry of his impotency issues.
The morning they take their leave from Shell Cottage (which, in case you forgot, is by the sea!), Harry briefly muses over the weather before Bella!Hermione heads out. Her disguise work on Ron... leads to two of the dirtiest-sounding lines in the book, actually.
"Okay, Ron, come here so I can do you..."
"Well, he's not my type, but he'll do," said Harry.
I can't make this stuff up. Some of the fandom's more... imaginative minds, certainly, or a lot of May's LJ fuss wouldn't have happened. But not me.
Speaking of May, JKR also makes one of her quasi-sudden time frame leaps in this chapter. I mean, six chapters ago it was January, wasn't it? This really threw me off on the first attempt, since I skimmed right over her attempts in the previous chapter atshowing telling the passage of time.
Mostly, I think this bit is one of the more painful symptoms of JKR holding herself to the school-year format when the characters she's focusing on... you know, aren't in school. It'd be one thing if she'd written the 'meanwhile, back at Hogwarts...' adventures most of fandom wants to have read, and occasionally flashed to the Trio on the Nature Trail to Hell. But she didn't, so instead we're stuck with a good ten or fifteen chapters of filler, Department of Backstory, and waiting for the plot to happen. And to think, if she'd let herself write the plot first and the backstory after, the final battle could have been over by Christmas...
Anyway! The disguised (or invisible) Trio Plus Griphook take off for London, where getting into Diagon Alley runs them into their first very plausible stumbling point: Hermione is, inherently, too nice to be Bellatrix. Then again, most people aren't that nasty, which is probably good for the world at large.
...Of course, when the second flaw (that being the surprise addition of a Death Eater to our merry band of travelers) makes itself known, Bella!Hermione has a good go at making up for her early cordiality.
When they reach the bank, Ron Confounds the door guards, and... I just have to say that this was a much, much cooler trick when Obi-Wan Kenobi did it in Star Wars. Considering Hermione basically fills in the gap with "These are not the imposters you are looking for. Move along," I feel this isn't a terribly far-fetched comparison.
Once inside, it turns out the goblins are a little bit better informed than the Trio was expecting them to be. To keep things from getting out of hand, Harry... breaks out the Imperios. Gutsy, Potter, gutsy. I suppose since you were already breaking into a bank and impersonating the targeted vault's owner, you felt you had nothing to lose, hmm?
They get pretty far down into the depths of the bank before the cart dumps them through an enchantment-dispelling waterfall. I have two things to say about this particular bit, the first being that the Trio didn't do their preliminary research as well as they'd thought. I would have been asking Griphook what we might run into if someone in the bank suspected a robbery attempt - hard to adequately prepare for internal defenses if you have no idea what they are.
Second, up to this point, I was honestly wondering if JKR had forgotten how long she had established Polyjuice as lasting, way back in CoS. The Ministry sneak, at the very least, felt like it took more than an hour, yet there was no mention of any of the Trio needing to take in more, and that would have been a perfect opportunity to throw even more wrenches into the works than she did. This isn't the sort of complication that ought to be handwaved out of existence. It could have given her Plot!
They get past a mostly-blind dragon (there will be more about that later) and on to the vault they're after. Once they get to the treasure, though, another epic failure in the Trio's planning comes to light. Here's a question you should have asked, guys: "Are there any charms or curses on the items in vaults that serve as security measures?"
Yeah, about that. Especially when they turn out to be the sort that'll bury you under a pile of hot metal. This and the waterfall bit represent the real flaw in the Trio's plan, I think. Instead of asking what they might be up against and how best to get around that, they asked how to get by the front desk with minimal hassle.
The pile-of-hot-metal business, once the cup they're after turns up on a high shelf, presents a few problems. They have to get the thing down without actually touching it, or anything else in the vault. Harry suggests hooking a handle with the Incredible Horcrux-Killing Sword, after someone levitates him up high enough to reach it.
...Here's my question about that, though. Why not levitate Harry within reach of the cup - so he can run it through with the sword? Just because a vertical stroke is probably out of the question, in light of the shelving, doesn't mean a horizontal stroke wouldn't do. And if a few other things get smashed along the way... well, they already snuck into the vault, so how much more would they have to lose?
But this is Rowlingland (where common sense is optional, if not outright discouraged), and more specifically it's Harry's brain. Applying logic to the problem was my first mistake.
Once the cup's down from the shelf, anyway, Griphook shows he's a far sneakier bastard than the Trio expected him to be. Making off with the sword, calling attention to the impostors the bank authorities have probably been looking for since the Trio came in, and getting it all done without the people he helped sneak in ever suspecting... it's an admirable piece of work, in its way. You'd think at least one of those kids would know seven books later to be careful about precisely who they were trusting, but there I go thinking again.
(The back of my mind, now that I think of it, is making me wonder what that multiplication charm could have meant for the Horcrux. If JKR really wanted to complicate people's lives, she could have had the cup clone itself exactly, Voldiesoul and all. Our dear evil overlord probably would have had a real blast with being pulled into hundreds more pieces than he ever expected.
It may be just as well she didn't, though, since no one had time to stick around and chop up every last cup. Particularly with Griphook making off with the sword.)
In between trying to fend off the bank authorities - and bellowing again, which he really doesn't have the body type to be doing - Harry opens the chains on the dragon and gets the Trio on it before it realizes it's free to take off.
First, the spell Hermione's using to help their escape threw me for a loop. Aren't there other spells that could have exploded the passageway or gouged it out or something? Why introduce a new one? (If I'm too confused for this to hold water, do let me know.) And also, I apparently wasn't hallucinating when I remembered 'relashio' being set to multiple purposes. PICK AN EFFECT AND STICK TO IT.
Second? When the unit of escape is or is steered by the visually impaired, whether for the actual getaway or not, it's going to remind me of the end of Sneakers. And it will probably pale in comparison to Whistler driving. I don't care if there's a dragon involved in this case, Whistler's cooler!
And for all the various bits of this chapter that reminded me of the film (rent it, if you're not familiar; it's lovely) have left me with the mental image of James Earl Jones scowling and saying, "We are the Ministry of Magic. We don't do that sort of thing!"... I think I would have much preferred to read something new. Granted, I do like that the Trio's plan goes to hell in a handbasket on them, but I've seen it before and this version has 100% less Angry Ben Kingsley.
(...'course, Cosmo could outthink old Moldyshorts any day of the week.)
minkhollow.***
In which Gringotts appears to have taken advantage of security testing, the Trio did not plan for
So. Starting in the previous chapter, the Trio's been getting insider information on Gringotts from Griphook, for great stealing a probable Horcrux from the Lestranges' vault. A big part of their plan involves Polyjuicing Hermione into Bellatrix.
This? Is actually a remarkably good start, all things considered. Even though they know some of the pitfalls of Polyjuice impersonation coming off the Ministry sneak, this time they know a fair amount about who they're impersonating - and hey, they even have her wand!
Speaking of which, Hermione gets the receiving end of wrong wand existential angst, despite dismissing Harry's as lack of practice earlier. Harry, showing an amazing amount of common sense, opts not to call her on it. Here's a funny thing, though - having Draco's wand seems to have cured Harry of his impotency issues.
The morning they take their leave from Shell Cottage (which, in case you forgot, is by the sea!), Harry briefly muses over the weather before Bella!Hermione heads out. Her disguise work on Ron... leads to two of the dirtiest-sounding lines in the book, actually.
"Okay, Ron, come here so I can do you..."
"Well, he's not my type, but he'll do," said Harry.
I can't make this stuff up. Some of the fandom's more... imaginative minds, certainly, or a lot of May's LJ fuss wouldn't have happened. But not me.
Speaking of May, JKR also makes one of her quasi-sudden time frame leaps in this chapter. I mean, six chapters ago it was January, wasn't it? This really threw me off on the first attempt, since I skimmed right over her attempts in the previous chapter at
Mostly, I think this bit is one of the more painful symptoms of JKR holding herself to the school-year format when the characters she's focusing on... you know, aren't in school. It'd be one thing if she'd written the 'meanwhile, back at Hogwarts...' adventures most of fandom wants to have read, and occasionally flashed to the Trio on the Nature Trail to Hell. But she didn't, so instead we're stuck with a good ten or fifteen chapters of filler, Department of Backstory, and waiting for the plot to happen. And to think, if she'd let herself write the plot first and the backstory after, the final battle could have been over by Christmas...
Anyway! The disguised (or invisible) Trio Plus Griphook take off for London, where getting into Diagon Alley runs them into their first very plausible stumbling point: Hermione is, inherently, too nice to be Bellatrix. Then again, most people aren't that nasty, which is probably good for the world at large.
...Of course, when the second flaw (that being the surprise addition of a Death Eater to our merry band of travelers) makes itself known, Bella!Hermione has a good go at making up for her early cordiality.
When they reach the bank, Ron Confounds the door guards, and... I just have to say that this was a much, much cooler trick when Obi-Wan Kenobi did it in Star Wars. Considering Hermione basically fills in the gap with "These are not the imposters you are looking for. Move along," I feel this isn't a terribly far-fetched comparison.
Once inside, it turns out the goblins are a little bit better informed than the Trio was expecting them to be. To keep things from getting out of hand, Harry... breaks out the Imperios. Gutsy, Potter, gutsy. I suppose since you were already breaking into a bank and impersonating the targeted vault's owner, you felt you had nothing to lose, hmm?
They get pretty far down into the depths of the bank before the cart dumps them through an enchantment-dispelling waterfall. I have two things to say about this particular bit, the first being that the Trio didn't do their preliminary research as well as they'd thought. I would have been asking Griphook what we might run into if someone in the bank suspected a robbery attempt - hard to adequately prepare for internal defenses if you have no idea what they are.
Second, up to this point, I was honestly wondering if JKR had forgotten how long she had established Polyjuice as lasting, way back in CoS. The Ministry sneak, at the very least, felt like it took more than an hour, yet there was no mention of any of the Trio needing to take in more, and that would have been a perfect opportunity to throw even more wrenches into the works than she did. This isn't the sort of complication that ought to be handwaved out of existence. It could have given her Plot!
They get past a mostly-blind dragon (there will be more about that later) and on to the vault they're after. Once they get to the treasure, though, another epic failure in the Trio's planning comes to light. Here's a question you should have asked, guys: "Are there any charms or curses on the items in vaults that serve as security measures?"
Yeah, about that. Especially when they turn out to be the sort that'll bury you under a pile of hot metal. This and the waterfall bit represent the real flaw in the Trio's plan, I think. Instead of asking what they might be up against and how best to get around that, they asked how to get by the front desk with minimal hassle.
The pile-of-hot-metal business, once the cup they're after turns up on a high shelf, presents a few problems. They have to get the thing down without actually touching it, or anything else in the vault. Harry suggests hooking a handle with the Incredible Horcrux-Killing Sword, after someone levitates him up high enough to reach it.
...Here's my question about that, though. Why not levitate Harry within reach of the cup - so he can run it through with the sword? Just because a vertical stroke is probably out of the question, in light of the shelving, doesn't mean a horizontal stroke wouldn't do. And if a few other things get smashed along the way... well, they already snuck into the vault, so how much more would they have to lose?
But this is Rowlingland (where common sense is optional, if not outright discouraged), and more specifically it's Harry's brain. Applying logic to the problem was my first mistake.
Once the cup's down from the shelf, anyway, Griphook shows he's a far sneakier bastard than the Trio expected him to be. Making off with the sword, calling attention to the impostors the bank authorities have probably been looking for since the Trio came in, and getting it all done without the people he helped sneak in ever suspecting... it's an admirable piece of work, in its way. You'd think at least one of those kids would know seven books later to be careful about precisely who they were trusting, but there I go thinking again.
(The back of my mind, now that I think of it, is making me wonder what that multiplication charm could have meant for the Horcrux. If JKR really wanted to complicate people's lives, she could have had the cup clone itself exactly, Voldiesoul and all. Our dear evil overlord probably would have had a real blast with being pulled into hundreds more pieces than he ever expected.
It may be just as well she didn't, though, since no one had time to stick around and chop up every last cup. Particularly with Griphook making off with the sword.)
In between trying to fend off the bank authorities - and bellowing again, which he really doesn't have the body type to be doing - Harry opens the chains on the dragon and gets the Trio on it before it realizes it's free to take off.
First, the spell Hermione's using to help their escape threw me for a loop. Aren't there other spells that could have exploded the passageway or gouged it out or something? Why introduce a new one? (If I'm too confused for this to hold water, do let me know.) And also, I apparently wasn't hallucinating when I remembered 'relashio' being set to multiple purposes. PICK AN EFFECT AND STICK TO IT.
Second? When the unit of escape is or is steered by the visually impaired, whether for the actual getaway or not, it's going to remind me of the end of Sneakers. And it will probably pale in comparison to Whistler driving. I don't care if there's a dragon involved in this case, Whistler's cooler!
And for all the various bits of this chapter that reminded me of the film (rent it, if you're not familiar; it's lovely) have left me with the mental image of James Earl Jones scowling and saying, "We are the Ministry of Magic. We don't do that sort of thing!"... I think I would have much preferred to read something new. Granted, I do like that the Trio's plan goes to hell in a handbasket on them, but I've seen it before and this version has 100% less Angry Ben Kingsley.
(...'course, Cosmo could outthink old Moldyshorts any day of the week.)
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no subject
Date: 2008-02-03 06:53 am (UTC)And you're so right about the stupidity of stealing something you're just going to destroy...with the item that could be used to destroy it. *headdesk*
(Mmm...must go watch Sneakers now. ^_^)
no subject
Date: 2008-02-03 07:06 am (UTC)My mental image of the cup, never mind the book's claims to the contrary, never includes handles. It tends to come across as one of those... I think they're called pilsner glasses? The tall ones for beer that're wider near the top? (Don't mind me, it's Late.) In any case, Harry's grand plan would've been that much grander if he would've taken the action then, rather than just make off with the thing and let Ron and Hermione take the action later.
(I need to re-watch it myself... if only to fuel the damn Highly Improbable Crossover this thing started.
no subject
Date: 2008-02-03 02:47 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-02-03 04:31 pm (UTC)